areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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