You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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