i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
