Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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