So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
