I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
