Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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