help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
