Walk of Shame. In a state park.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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