office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
You need a sexual gate keeper
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
