oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize