I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
