i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
