He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Randomize
