There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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