Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
