When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
