maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
