He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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