i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
