i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
