I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
