return my video game
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
