I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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