Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
