Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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