one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize