dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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