If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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