ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize