I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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