fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
there is glitter all over my balls
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