Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
