At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
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