WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize