he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
