I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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