On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
