Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize