don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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