He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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