So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize