then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Sorry my hands just texted you
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
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