I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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