This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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