Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
