I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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