I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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