i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.