I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.