Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
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